One of the benefits of meditation practice is that we learn to connect with our completeness. We sit tall and as the mind settles, our energy becomes more tangible. This happens independent of any action or feedback from another. We are not looking for someone to say “good job” or “you are such a great meditator”. Anyone who practices for even a short period of time will recognize that meditation is challenging and much of the work comes from simply taking the time to sit! In practice, we work with what arises moment to moment, and cultivate the skill of noticing without judgement.
This skill comes in handy when we are out in the world and notice self-doubt. It often arises in relation to others. You might notice yourself thinking “Why can’t I be more talkative like her? More easy-going like him? More flexible like her?” When we see someone else’s brilliance, we may admire and be drawn to that person, appreciating their qualities. It is also possible that we will wish we were more like them and at times doubt our own brilliance and light. In truth, to recognize a quality in another means we already have a piece of that quality in our self. My teacher Jon Fabbro once said to me, “Every time you notice you’re unworthiness, it is a reminder of how worthy you are.” It is true.
You do not need to be more like anyone in order to be valuable. You only need to recognize and own your innate goodness. For a practice, begin by noticing when self doubt is present. Each time you notice self-doubt, connect with the feeling of your body and your breath. This will anchor you to your energy. In that moment, consciously take a breath and remember that you are lovable and complete just as you are.